Take-Out

Dec 03

"The guy who invented General Tso's Chicken died. Finally, I can get a night's sleep."

“The guy who invented General Tso’s Chicken has died. To celebrate his life, I ordered some Vegetable Lo Mein.”



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Holiday Spirits

Dec 02

"It's Happy Hour - Not I'm  so done with you hour."

” As the person solely responsible for planning and organizing this years’ office holiday party – Sorry not sorry about no organic soy egg-nog.”



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Talking Fish Head

Dec 01

"I keep losing my lip balm."

“I keep losing my lip balm.”



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50+ Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show

Nov 30

"Victoria's Secret Fashion Show? How about Sylvia's Secret stuffed cabbage recipe?"

” Our show will feature tummy control panties, support bras &  fuzzy sleep socks.”



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Cyber Mondazed

Nov 28

"Hate to interrupt your shopping with work."

“Hate to interrupt your online shopping experience with work stuff.”



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Good Gravy

Nov 26

"Today's the day, they're finally tired of their turkey & stuffing and they dump it in our bowl."

“Half went in the garbage, half in our bowls. Gotta love two days after Thanksgiving leftovers.”



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Family Traditions

Nov 24

"Your cousin Rita called, she's making that potatoes cooked in the dishwasher recipe and you need to stop her."

“Cousin Rita called.She’s cooking that potatoes in the dishwasher recipe from BuzzFeed.”



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