Category: Work

Monday Motivation

"The population of Wyoming is 585,501. The size of Gary's inbox had grown to 586,000 emails. Gary thought about quitting and moving to Wyoming."
“The population of Wyoming is 585,501. Gary’s inbox has 587,000 emails. He suddenly wants to quit and move to Wyoming.” 


Crappy Hour

Can we just talk about work- Current events are wearing us out.”
“Can we just talk about work-Current events are wearing us out.”


Plan On It

"Let's plan on making better plans for our next planning sessions."
“Let’s plan on making better plans for our next planning session.”


Fair & Off-Balanced

"Our ethics team discovered the muffins were in fact, not all gluten free."
“We’ve got a few fairly honest employees who aren’t too busy Friday afternoons – That’s our ethics team.”


Monday Feeling on Tuesday

"When you're back to work after the holidays and you start rethinking your life goals."
“And just like that, the holidays were over and Gary was back at his work desk.”


Cyber Mondazed

"Hate to interrupt your shopping with work."
“Hate to interrupt your online shopping experience with work stuff.”


Dog Performance Reviews

"Someone's been marking the conference room rug."
“Your composure during thunderstorms – tells us you view problems as opportunities.” 


Focus Groups

"They're reorganizing, consolidating and cleaning out. I't soffial - no more refridgerator in the breakroom."
“We are entering the decision making phase in the reorganization and consolidation of the break-room refrigerator.”


Jobs Reporter

"Here's my final jobs report of the year - still don't have one."
Here’s my monthly jobs report – Still don’t have one.”


Set It & Forget It

"End of year, fourth quarter - time to whip out the old crockpot magic."
“It’s year end, fourth quarter – Time to whip out those slow-cookers and get busy.”